Learning To Say No to Take Better Care of Yourself

If you are like most women, you have probably bee tuaght to be ‘nice’ and a ‘people pleaser’. The trouble with this is that everyone else will be pleased EXCEPT you!

If you are feeling like a pressure cooker about to explode, or as if you are running on an empty fuel tank, it’s time to practice saying NO.

Piling On Stress

Not being able to say no can greatly contribute to elevated stress and poor physical health. Trying to do too much is a fast way to get burned out. It can add to chronic stress, and people who cannot say no are usually the first to fall victim to bad health.

It is important to understand your own boundaries and limitations. While helping others is important, you have to take care of yourself first in order to be able to care for anyone else. This means sometimes saying no to friends and family, in order to maintain an optimal level of health and wellness for yourself.

Feelings Of Obligation

This is by far the most common cause of resentment between people, because they are basically “forced” to say yes whether or not they want to. Maybe the person asking did a major favor for you in life, maybe it is a family member you can’t avoid, but either way, they keep coming to you over and over again.

If this is the case, you need to ask yourself “When have I paid them back in full?” You can make it clear that you appreciate what they did in the past but you’ve done a lot since and are on you own path and mission in life. With so few waking hours in the day, you need to follow your path.

Enabling Behavior

Learning to say no is important so you don’t enable others to commit bad behavior. If you never say no to a child, for example, they will become very spoiled and impossible to deal with.

From friends begging you for a loan to fuel their unnecessary spending, to people asking you to go out drinking with them when you suspect they have an alcohol problem, it is in their best interests to say no, and mean it.

Avoid Suffering in Silence

There have undoubtedly been numerous times when you have sat in silence, suffering and fuming. This is not healthy. You might not be able to control other people, but you CAN control the way you react to others. You might hate confrontation, but sometimes it is the only way to effect positive change in your life.


NO is NOT a bad word. It is actually one of the healthiest choices you can make. You deserve to be your best self and live your best life. That being the case, practice saying it in front of a mirror. No, I’m sorry will give you the freedom you are longing for.

One final point-do NOT give a reason. That would leave the door open to them trying to get around you and make you say yes. Say no, and mean it. End of discussion. You will be a lot happier and healthier once you master this.


Book Review: An Unquiet Mind

An Unquiet Mind: A memoir of Moods and Madness

Psychiatrist Kay Redfield Jamison, is turning the tables in An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness. Unlike her previous book, Touched with Fire, Jamison turns the mirror on herself, looking at her own medical condition, that of manic depression.

She takes the bold step of bringing her readers into her world to try to share what many people experience, mental illness. In many cases, it is the result of a chemical imbalance disease, NOT some sort of character flaw or weakness.

Jamison says, “There is a particular kind of pain, elation, loneliness and terror involved in this kind of madness…. It will never end, for madness carves its own reality.”

What is normal for a person with manic depression is captured in great detail by this talented author: “We are all, as Byron put it, differently organized,” Jamison writes.

An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness will make those suffering from manic depression, bipolar disease or any other type of mood disorder feel a little less alone and better understood.

Jamison shares her life from her childhood through living her life now, as what some call her, the healer and the healed. She manages her diagnosis of manic depression with startling results, not only taking control of it, but also turning it into her life’s work.

Jamison has spent her medical career attempting to become the world’s leading expert on what she has lived with and deals with every day, in the hope of healing herself and anyone else with similar mood disorders.

If you are living with manic depression/bipolar disease and feel that no one understands what you are going through, An Unquiet Mind is the perfect book for you. It also makes a great gift for those you love who may also suffer with this chemically imbalanced illness.
Buy now at Amazon=An Unquiet Mind


How to Deal Naturally With Ugly Stretch Marks

If you are a woman who has given birth, or even a woman who has dieted and lost a significant number of pounds, you might be suffering now from stretch marks. If you are like most women (and not a few men) who have ended up with stretch marks due to weight loss or related factors, you are probably looking for something that can help reduce the unsightly appearance of your stretch marks.

If you are a woman who is pregnant, you can try to prevent stretch marks by massaging your belly every day with olive oil. Other areas to pay attention to because of baby weight gain or swelling as the pregnancy advances are the thighs, buttocks and the backs and sides of your knees.

If you have developed stretch marks as the result of weight loss, especially rapid weight loss, it can take some time to treat them. The first step will be to apply olive oil and massage it into the affected area for a few minutes each day.

The second solution will be to try to spot-trim that area with appropriate exercise. For example, if you have stretch marks on the backs of your upper arms, you can do tricep kick backs to firm up the muscle tone in that area to reduce the appearance of stretch marks and those unsightly ‘wings’ that particularly women can get, especially as they get older.

Many people have found regular massages with olive oil in the affected areas can improve the appearance of stretch marks in a very short period of time. Then the key will be to keep it up and watch what you eat and drink in order to maintain good skin and muscle tone.

Massaging every day or at least three days a week can help diminish the appearance of stretch marks, particularly the ones that look like deep purple grooves.

There are some commercial products on the market that claim to offer miracle cures for stretch marks, but in most cases, they are using only similar moisturizing ingredients and often a good deal of chemicals, and charging a far higher price for their remedy. Save your money and use the olive oil you have right in your own home to help get the better-looking skin you are looking for.


The Smart Woman’s Do-It-Yourself Guide to a Greener Home

Going Green For New Moms: A Beginner’s Guide to Raising Your Baby in an Eco-friendly Way

The New Green Family Guide: A Beginner’s Guide to Going Green As a Family


Working Out Without Working Up Too Much of a Sweat

Summer is here, and with it the hot, sticky weather. Unless you are heading for the beach or pool for a swim to cool down, it can be hard to stay motivated to work out in the warm weather.

Fortunately, there are some workouts that you can do which can help you tone, trim and burn calories without getting soaked in sweat. One of them is bellydancing. It can be fast and fun, and help you feel sexy and feminine too, instead of too macho.

Shimmy: The Complete First Season


Shimmy: The Complete Second Season

can help you stay fit and bring out your inner goddess.

Another idea is yoga. It can keep you fit and also aids in developing lean muscle. For any woman who wants to be strong but not too bulked up, these DVDs are ideal.
Namaste Yoga: The Complete First Season

Namaste Yoga: The Complete Second Season

Namaste: The Five Elements in Yoga

For a harder yoga workout, you might consider trying Kundalini Yoga. It emphasizes transformation through a series of poses, and there are therefore no levels in Kundalini as there are with other forms of yoga.

Kundalini Yoga With Gurmukh

Kundalini Yoga for Beginners & Beyond

Kundalini is particularly good for losing weight:
Fat Free Yoga – Lose Weight & Feel Great w/ Ana Brett & Ravi Singh NOW W/THE **MATRIX**

Weight Loss with Kundalini Yoga DVD

Yoga for Weight Loss (Deluxe 3 DVD set with over 30 routines))

So if you are looking for some great ways to stay fit during the summer, or all year round, without getting too hot and sweaty, pop in a DVD and start to shimmy or strike a [yoga] pose.


How to Build a Rife Machine


Moderately Challenging

Things You’ll Need

“Rife Machine Kit”
24 feet of 22 gauge speaker wire with two conductors (wires), stranded
1 stereo jack
Two solderless crimp ring connectors for 16 gauge wire
Two 2 inch by 2 inch by 1/16 inch thick brass plates
Two 1/8 inch pop rivets, aluminum, 1/4 inch long
Wire cutters
Wire stripper
Soldering iron
Drill with 1/8 inch bit
Pop riveter
Stereo, at least 100 watts, with a speaker jack

“Frequency Kit”
Internet connection
CD burner
List of diseases to treat
Recordings of disease frequencies in WAV format


A Rife machine is an electronic device used as an alternative form of disease treatment for a variety of medical conditions. Frequencies are used to treat the diseases, with specific frequency modulations for each disease. The Rife machine is named after, but only loosely connected with, the American doctor and inventor Royal Raymond Rife. There are many Rife machines on the market, most of them very expensive. You can make a Rife machine yourself in a short time, for a fraction of the cost.

Assembling the Rife Machine

Step 1

Drill a 1/8-inch hole into the first brass plate. Repeat with the second plate.

Step 2

Cut the wire into two 12-foot lengths. Strip the casing from the two wire strands of the speaker wire. Bare about 1/2 inch of wire at either end of each of the two wires (4 ends in total).

Step 3

Insert both strands of one end of the bared wire into one of the crimp ring connectors. Be sure the wire is in the saddle of the connector.

Step 4

Attach the crimp connector to the metal plate using one of the pop rivets.

Step 5

Hammer the protruding parts of the pop rivet as flat as possible to each side of the plate.

Step 6

On the opposite end of the speaker wire, separate the two strands of the wire. Solder one end of the first strand to the tip and ring of the stereo jack. Solder the second strand of the wire to the jack to ground the wire.

Step 7

Repeat Steps 2 to 6 with the second piece of wire.

Step 8

Plug the stereo jack into your stereo.

Assembling the Frequency Kit

Step 1

On your computer, log onto the Internet and go to http://www.electroherbalism.com/Bioelectronics/FrequenciesandAnecdotes/CAFL.htm or another reliable site for Rife machine frequencies.

Step 2

Look up the diseases you wish to treat on your list. Each disease listing should state frequency and length of time for treatment for each frequency. It should also have instructions on how often to use your Rife machine for each disease.

Step 3

Locate the frequencies and their WAV files at http://www.electroherbalism.com/Bioelectronics/FrequenciesandAnecdotes/index.htm.

Download all the frequencies into a separate folder for each disease. Many of them will come as zipped archives with all the frequencies included.

Step 4

Burn your frequency WAV files from your disease folder onto a CD. Repeat for each disease on your list.

Step 5

Place the CD of your choice into your stereo.

Using the Rife Machine

Step 1

Sitting or reclining comfortably in a chair or bed near the stereo, grip each metal plate in the palm of your hand. Press PLAY on your stereo.

Step 2

You should be able to feel a tingly sensation in your hands. The lower the frequency, the more you will feel it. The higher, the less you will feel it.

Adjust the volume on the stereo to adjust the comfort level of your Rife treatment.

Step 3

Play the CD through to the end of the treatment. Relax after the treatment for a few moments.

Step 4

Step 5


You can also apply the metal plates to the specific problem spots on your body — for example, your knee.

Get some small velcro straps to hold the plates in place against your palms or your specific trouble area.


The sound of the frequencies is harmless, but can be annoying to people and dogs. Unplug your speakers before treatment.

Follow the instructions for your Rife machine treatment for each disease carefully.

Avoid using Rife machines if you have an electronic device already implanted, such as a pacemaker.

Seek medical treatment and consult with your doctor before undertaking any alternative remedies.

Key Concepts

  • Rife machine
  • Rife generator
  • Rife frequencies


Resources (Further Reading)