Keeping the romance in your relationship is really all about staying connected with one another.
How do you stay connected? By spending time with each other, sharing with each other, and yes, through the connection of sex.
COUPLES COUPLE!
Sex is the ultimate connection and reason why a couple is together as a couple—to couple! Otherwise, you could just go to dinner or the movies with anyone, and get a baby via the sperm bank!
Clearly, humans feel a natural sexual desire and passion, and seek a healthy outlet for it.
If intercourse gives you thrombosis
And continence causes neurosis,
I’d rather expire
Fulfilling desire
Than live in a state of psychosis.
So why does sex in the 21st century seem so problematic that advice about it is screamed at us from every magazine headline? If we are living in much more liberated times than ever before, just what IS the trouble with sex?
Sexual intercourse began
In nineteen sixty-three
(Which was rather late for me)—
Between the end of the Chatterley ban
And the Beatles’ first LP.
–Philip Larkin (June 16, 1967)
THE KEY TO IT ALL: A FOUR-LETTER WORK ENDING IN -K
Oddly enough, in an age where we are on email and cell phones 24/7, our communication skills seem to have broken down completely. There may be a lot of TALK, but not a lot of listening. The best mobile network or WiFi connection, but no communion.
What passes for busi-ness is really just BUSY-ness, and writing the To Do List, is a substitute for actually doing the things on the list. Which means the list will NEVER get done. There will always be a new list. So why not add intercourse to you list?
Have you ever thought about the word intercourse? It means TALK as well!
To be strictly accurate, the word intercourse is defined as:
The exchange of ideas by writing, speech, or signals: communication, communion, intercommunication (Roget s II: The New Thesaurus, Third Edition. 1995)
Isn’t THAT the kind of romantic relationship you would like? Real intercommuncation and communion?
IS THERE REALLY ANY SUCH THING AS ‘HAVING IT ALL’?
Often the couples who want to ‘have it all’ end up having the least amount of sex and romance. It’s like everything else on the to do list is more important.
Or, as some psychologists have suggested, that people get married/settle down so they can stop having sex/looking for sex. They want to focus on other things, career, house, nesting, children.
Sex is sacrificed in favor of ‘getting ahead’-but many partners wake up one day and wonder how on earth they got HERE? How the romance may hve started out so blissfully, and ended up relegated to a furtive fumble every few weeks if you’re lucky.
Intercourse with a woman is sometimes a satisfactory substitute for masturbation. But it takes a lot of imagination to make it work.
Karl Kraus
Focusing on long term goals is fine, so long as BOTH couples are on board with that agenda. And not BORED with it.
If you ARE wondering how you got HERE, and ARE Bored with the lack of romantic spark in your relationship, read on…
See more at Keeping the Romance in Your Relationship Part 2
